You Can't Buy Love on Russian Dating Sites

Imagine this scenario. A gentleman signs up for a Russian dating site and pays the necessary membership fees. He searches for a lady that catches his eye and initiates correspondence. The two chat, maybe for a few weeks, possibly for a few months, and things seem to go well. One day the gentleman suggests a face-to-face meeting and possibly marriage. For whatever reason, the lady is not ready to take such an important step. The gentleman, shocked and angry that she is not willing to go along with his plans, calls the lady a scammer and claims she was never serious about him. He may even vent his frustration on a blacklist site. Do you think this reaction is fair?

Unfortunately, this hostile response is what many ladies face when they do not see eye-to-eye with an online suitor. While most gentleman would never accuse a traditional dating partner of being scammer (even though he may spend hundreds of dollars on flowers, dinners, movies, and other dating expenses), some men do not hesitate to label the women on Russian dating sites. Why? Because of misperceptions about the international matchmaking, or the so-called "mail order bride" industry. Many gentlemen feel, whether they admit it or not, that ladies on Russian dating sites owe them something for service fees and chat costs. They believe that if they shell out enough money, they should have their pick of any lady on the site. While this may have been the case in the pioneer days of international matchmaking, it is certainly not the case today.

The simple truth about most Russian dating sites is this: The membership fees clients pay help facilitate communication between Russian women and Western men (something both parties might never enjoy without our service). The fees do NOT, however, guarantee any man the lady of his choice, nor do they obligate the women on Russian dating sites to behave a certain way. To win a lady's heart, a gentleman must get to know her as a person and court her the old-fashioned way. Even then there are no guarantees. But when it happens for real, that is what is what makes finding The One so special.

I write about Russia, Russian culture, and Russian dating sites.

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